coming back

Well, I finally decided I've had enough of being distant and return to the realms of the internet instead of ninja-lurking and pretending my life inside it doesn't exist. To be fair I had a good excuse and uh...well, my dad died. July 27th. Heart attack. All of it was so sudden and I (being the eldest daughter) had to carry my family into adjusting to this new life without him overnight. As of today, it's been 7 weeks. I can't say I have my feet planted firmly on the ground yet, but I am doing the best I can. Supporting my mother throughout all of this is probably more difficult than actually losing him...or maybe I'm just saying that because everything between me and my father has been so complicated I have no godly idea how to process my own grief? Literally would like to thank my earth placements for carrying me through everyday, focusing on what needs to be done and how to create some sort of stability now for my mom.

I am doing alright though, I think I can safely say that. While it is different, in some ways it is also better. And I'm not entirely sure what the next years will bring, but I remain optimistic that all of us can still find the light in this new chapter without him.

Hope you got to where you're going safely, Dad.